TV

Ever watched Bobby Flay or Rachael Ray on the Food Network and thought, “I could do that?” Well, now’s your chance to put up or shut up, as the network is coming to Dallas in search of The Next Foot Network Star. The casting team will be at the W Hotel (2440 Victory Park Lane) from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Friday looking for people who know how to cook, have a good personality and have a unique cooking style. The winner gets a six-episode show on Food Network.

TV viewers hooked on cliffhanger episodes of hit shows such as Heroes and Grey’s Anatomy could be left dangling if Hollywood writers walk off the job as soon as Thursday.

So we want to know: How would you end your favorite TV show's cliff hanger?

As I have previously stated, I'm a first-season viewer of Dancing with the Stars, so maybe I still haven't sorted out all the customs in this strange new land, but it strikes me as weird that the best dancer (Sabrina Bryan) in a dance competition is the one that's eliminated while the worst dancer (Marie Osmond) is spared.

Our Mavs man was the last plainly unskilled dancer to be cut. From here on out, every elimination is going to be tough. Or is it? Mel B, the Spice girl not only still scary but even scarier after all these years, won the judges' voting on Monday night with a perfect score of 30. But if her rhumba was an example of perfection on DWTS, then give me flaws.

Alexander Doll Company is selling Desperate Housewives dolls. But I seriously can't tell who's who (except Bree, only because she has red hair). Suggested retail is $129.95.

America's Next Top Model was, uh, a little uneventful last night except for one thing: Tyson Beckford, whom I have declared the only male model worth giving a second look. The girls' tongues were on the floor. Not literally, of course, but they may as well have been. I don't even want to tape over the episode. (Yes, I still own that thing called a VCR, but at least it's a DVD/VCR.) I had Tyson's Ralph Lauren ads plastered on my dorm room door in college.

Oh, and Mary J. (as in Blige) was on the show, too. I'm a fan, but hey, she's not Tyson.

Jayma Mays keeps popping up in small roles on TV shows that I'm addicted to. The doe-eye actress, who oddly was named Charlie on both Heroes and Ugly Betty, popped up as Elsita on last night's Pushing Daisies.

A quick question for Pushing Daisies fans...do you understand the whole Digby thing any better now? Even if Ned never touches him, he's still got to be incredibly old for a dog, right? Because Ned was 9 when he revived Digby. Maybe Ned's power has some kind of extra-long life attached to it. Or maybe I missed something? If I did, clue me in!

My two favorite new summer drama series both aired finales within this past week. And there were some juicy plot twists and reveals in both shows.

If you have DVRed but haven't watched the season-enders for Mad Men or Damages, go no further... spoilers lurk ahead.

Now that Cuban got the boot on Dancing With the Stars, we want your opinion: Was it too soon for him to go?

Which North Texas celeb would you like to see next on Dancing With the Stars?

A) Jerry Jones
B) Tom Hicks
C) Kelly Clarkson
D) Ashlee Simpson
E) Michael Irvin

Vote.

Mark Cuban ends his five-week run by getting eliminated. He lasted longer than he should and in the process showed the smarts and drive that have made him a billionaire. He figured out how to play the game to his advantage. He can't dance and his recent hip-replacement is the least of his problems. Recognizing that he was never going to win with the judges, he played to the viewers, wrapping himself in a sympathetic storyline -- the little billionaire that could -- and trying to win with fun and heart what his feet and sense of rhythm could never do for him.

If you are scared of the dark or spiders or something like that, tune into the Maury show today to feel a little better about yourself. The topic is unbelievable phobias, and Dallas Quincher Morgan will appear to discuss her extreme aversion to bubble gum. Boris Cherniak, a motivational hypnotist, will hopefully provide some help during the show, which airs at 2 p.m. on KDAF-TV (Channel 33).

Mel B's pre-performance video showed her and partner, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, backstage at a London performance of the Spice Girls, so viewers got a sneak-peak preview of the reunited Spice rack. In a word, ack. Back in their original 20th Century day, Mel B may have been "Scary Spice," but in this new 21st Century era, they're all Scary Spices.

If the question were should this be the end of Mark Cuban's run on DWTS, the answer would be easy. Of course it would be. It should've ended last week but Floyd Mayweather didn't have a sympathetic storyline to save him.

A few random thoughts on Monday night's episode:
*This was certainly the livest of live TV, as we not only had Marie's fainting spell to start things off, but something got messed up with the end of Mark's video feature, leaving us with the audience clapping over a dark screen.
*Speaking of Mark, I can't imagine a scenario in which he doesn't get sent packing Tuesday night. He got the lowest judges scores on a night when nearly everyone else impressed, including Mel. B, who was in the bottom two last week. He's taking the right approach by trying to be the most entertaining, but eventually the dancing part of the equation is going to catch up with him. Still -- can you believe how much weight he's lost? At least he's fit and ready to go for Mavs season.
*Edyta, with her slinky dress and slithering movies, proves once again that the line between professional dancer and pole dancer is razor thin.

A huffing and puffing -- but smiling, ever smiling -- Marie Osmond was standing at the judges' table with dance partner Jonathan Roberts. They were the first couple to dance, a samba, on this Latin night -- "the sexiest night of the season" promised host Tom Bergeron -- and head judge, Len Goodman was offering his critique when you heard an off-camera thump. Cut to the dancers and there you saw Ms Osmond flat on the floor and Tom Bergeron yelling to cut to commercial.

I adore the fact that Michael thinks that declaring bankruptcy is akin to declaring thumb war--you just yell really loud. Wasn't a huge fan of the re-appearance of dung-throwing Mose (he just bugs me, maybe he seems too out of the Office world for me). Anybody else think Angela and Dwight will get together again? Or was the cat murder (or mercy-killing, depending on your point of view) a deal-breaker?

Has anyone seen this? Time lists the top 100 TV shows ever.

I can get behind some of the shows on the list: My So-called Life (Jordan Catalano, teen angst, Rayanne Graff. OMG!), Saturday Night Live, The Wire and even General Hospital. Others I'm not so sure about. (Beavis and Butt-Head? Because "I am Cornholio!" defined a generation? Yeah, let's not get carried away.)

And while I don't like it, I can see how The Real World made the list. After all, we have it to blame for spawning reality television.

Check out the list and let me know what you think. Also, what shows should have been on the list? (Hello, Sports Night?)

On last night's episode, the black team stood around the kitchen counter whipping up a healthy lunch when trainer Jillian strolled in to offer a bit of meal-prep advice.
Chew a piece of gum to avoid snacking while cooking, she said, grabbing a pack that just happened to be sitting there.
"My favorite," she said, "is Wrigley's Extra Supermint gum."
She uttered this line while holding it up for the cameras, a la every commercial made in the 1980s. Good Lord. Hey, why not throw in a "Buy it today!" while you're at it?
It will shock no one to know that a real, normal commercial for Wrigley's Extra Supermint gum soon followed.

That huge, weird four-toed statue of a foot. What's that all about, anyway? Maybe we'll find out next year...

If you missed the first season (or two, or three) of ABC's Lost, you will be able to catch up next year. The Sci Fi Channel and the videogame-oriented outlet G4 have just secured off-network cable rights for all six seasons of the series. Season 4 starts on Feb. 6, 2008, and the producers have already announced that the series will end after six seasons.

The deal gives both G4 and Sci Fi rights to existing episodes of Lost, which the networks will premiere in prime time in fall 2008. Sci Fi plans to air four-hour mini-marathons of the show, while G4 promises interactive, on-screen elements.

As expected, self-promoting boxer Floyd Mayweather and his fiery partner Karina Smirnoff got the boot. More shocking was the fact that Scary Spice ended up in the bottom two. This will either a) create an anti-Cuban backlash amongst those who feel his dancing days should be over; or b) make people realize that, hey, Scary has professional dance experience and Cuban doesn't, so in all fairness, he should stay!
Methinks he should take that "Little Engine That Could" nickname and milk it for all it's worth.

A nation gasps: Mark and Kym aren't even in the bottom two. Our Cubes seemed endearingly thrilled by this, which is why we love him on the show. The winning streak (or at least not-losing streak) continues!

He's scaring me with his intense gazes and red-star-over-eye makeup!

My 7-year-old daughter just said, "It looks like she has two clay balls connected to her chest."
No comment.

In watching the recap of last night, I found it odd that Carrie Ann was crazy-strict with Jane Seymour about allegedly breaking the "no lifts" rule, but a few minutes later was completely over her obsession. Jennie Garth CLEARLY achieved liftoff, but Carrie Ann just applauded wildly. Same with Cameron "Superman with a C" Mathison.
Hey, if you're going to go all OCD on us about lifts, please remain consistent. That's all we ask.

Tom Bergeron keeps hyping up the fact that tonight's guests will include "a former competitor and a former champion." Any guesses? My money's on Cheryl and Drew. Just give Drew a regular gig on the show already!

What difference does it make? The fix is clearly in: This is the season of the Women. Every one of the women competitors has at least some dancing background and at least a couple of them have danced professionally. The men, meanwhile, are all strictly amateurs, and while some of them are gifted students, it's absurd to compare (at least, technically) what, say, Cameron or Helio is doing with whatever high-kicking, speed-spinning acrobatics Sabrina is whipping through. The Cheetah Girls were a lip-syncing dance troupe. I mean, what gives? How about featuring k.d. lang and LeAnn Rimes as contestants on the next season of American Idol?

This week's musical selections, even by this show's non-existent standards, were just dreadful. It was a sign of things to come when Mark Cuban and partner Kym Johnson opened the show by dancing a Viennese Waltz to a slowed-down and syrup-ed up version of -- wait for it -- Mr. Bojangles. Then Cheetah Girl Sabrina Bryan and partners Mark Ballas performed a pasa doble to a Depeche Mode song, then Jane Seymour was swooping through a waltz to a muzaky rendition of Billy Joel's Piano Man -- I mean, even more of a muzak-y version than the original.

Mark Cuban finally broke into the 20s, landing a 22 from the judges (two 7s and an 8), but more important to his fans is Floyd Mayweather's rise/fall to the top of the worst dancer list. As a dancer, he's a great boxer. He's got no fan base, at least -- judging by the ABC DWTS message board -- among viewers. So while the videotaped visit to an elementary school was sweet, I think the safe bet is that he is eliminated tomorrow night. After that, I don't see anyone stepping up to shield the Cube-inator from owning last place and he seems positioned to be cut next week.

From the LA Times' Matea Gold, there's worrisome ratings news for fans of Glenn Close's FX drama, Damages:

...even though network executives promise there will be a satisfying conclusion to the Patty Hewes-Arthur Frobisher showdown by the end of the season, they can't yet say as much about the fate of the series.

My Sooner fingers can't be forced to type the name with Texas first...
Anyhow, last night's Tonight Show piece about the State Fair and the game was pretty funny. Ross declared the Deep Fried Latte stand "where Texas meets L.A," got a ride in the Sooner Schooner (where he demonstrated that he doesn't exactly how to spell Oklahoma) and stepped into Big Tex's shoes for a moment or two (to tell passers-by much he loves their shoes).

He also figures that the State Fair is where the news stations get their anonymous shots for obesity segments. I'm looking for video, but haven't spotted it yet.

...it seems all the characters' story threads are becoming ever more intriguingly tangled.

Sterling Cooper creative director Don Draper may be a tortured soul leading two or three secret lives, but he's still more sympathetic than his subordinate Peter Campbell, the most weaselly WASP on television. Big boss Bert Cooper is a stand-up guy, charmingly quirky with his bonsai and his Ayn Rand. Cardiac case Roger Sterling looks like death warmed over and really needs to give up smoking, but secondhand fumes are probably bound to kill him anyway.

Poor hausfrau Betty Draper still hasn't got a clue; secretary and aspiring copywriter Peggy Olson still looks like a mouseburger but wants more; and queen bee Joan Holloway has shown some surprising signs of a budding feminist conscience. Retail heiress Rachel Menken might adore her married goy-friend, but she also gave Don the kick he needed to get back to reality and play tough with the covetous Campbell.

And the 1960 election's TV coverage, brought to us in living black-and-white, was a nostalgic reminder of bygone days. Ah, for when votes were tallied on blackboards and elections were stolen the good old-fashioned way: with back-room bribes and dead men casting ballots. Such classic American politics, compared to hanging chads.

So, if new Nobel Peace Prize recipient Al Gore goes on to be president, he would be just the latest laureate to grace the Oval Office -- the most recent being Josiah Bartlet, the former professor who won for economics.

Of course that would just be on TV. But I'll bet Martin Sheen, who played Bartlet on The West Wing, would approve.

Earlier presidents getting the Peace Prize: then-President Theodore Roosevelt in 1906 and former President Jimmy Carter, in 2002.